Moving in with your significant other before exchanging vows was unheard of when our parents tied the knot, let alone buying a house together. So much has changed over the last 30 years or so, and we are seeing couples challenging the status quo every day. I guess it’s just a generational thing…ya know, a millennial thing.
Anyway, it’s becoming more common to move in before marriage than ever before. In fact, you might even get funny looks if you don’t move in before the big day. I can vouch for that, considering my boyfriend and I (now fiancé) lived in an apartment together before we were engaged and then bought a house together (we still weren’t engaged yet). So why did we do that? I’m glad you asked!
Find Out If We Were Compatible
Things change when you move in together. When you first enter into a relationship, everything is all fun and games. You go on date nights and you put your best face forward…always. As fun as that can be, unfortunately that’s not real life. People have flaws and bad habits, which is totally normal. However, you would never truly discover those flaws or bad habits until you moved in with the person. If you’re a total neat freak and your partner is a little (or a lot) more laid back about things piling up here and there or leaving dishes in the sink for a few days, sharing living quarters will help you figure out how to make it work and whether the two of you can handle it. I know that sounds minor (and it is), but you get my point.
Learn To Share Responsibilities
Living in the same apartment or home has its own set of challenges. There’s cleaning and cooking and shopping that needs to be done. You might even have pets that need to be taken care of. All of these things add stress to a relationship, and how you handle that stress is a pretty good indicator for whether or not you’re ready for the commitment of marriage. You’ll need to divvy up the chores, take turns running errands, and learn to work together to manage the budget. Doing so will allow the two of you to find a fair balance, and essentially lead to a happier life.
Discover Their Spending Habits
Money, money, money… They say money problems are the number 1 cause for divorce. And that’s because it’s stressful to think about how expensive life is. And if you see your significant other excessively spending their money on shoes or trips with the boys, you’ll need to figure out how to handle that. You’ll need to talk to one another about any debts you have, from car payments and student loans to major credit card bills that need to be paid. Now you might be thinking, “Well duh, this is common sense.” However, these conversations don’t typically come up if you’re both still living with mommy and daddy or in your own apartment. And it will be a rude awakening when you get married and realize your partner’s bad habits 2 months into the marriage…
Now I’m not saying that one lifestyle choice is better or worse than the other. I’m a firm believer in doing whatever is right for you. If you find it in your heart that it’s best to wait until marriage to move in with one another, then you do that. However, if you feel it’s best to move in with your partner first, go for it!
Thanks for stopping by, friends! I hope you enjoyed and found this helpful. Please share if you did!